I’m scared. i’m terrified that i’ll never be able to be there for tomorrow for i’m still hanging by the thread that is my past. i am never worried about the future because i don’t think there’ll be any for me. i’m still dancing with my yesterdays, or more like they’re waltzing in and out as they please and dragging me along because i cannot help myself.
it’s so easy to dwell on what has been and what could have been than what could be. because maybe the past was all i deserved.
maybe that’s why it lodges in my attic rent free and comes downstairs when it likes to prey on my sorrows and vulnerability.
and maybe there’s a better tomorrow waiting outside my door, maybe it is knocking, but i cannot hear anything because i’m too busy accommodating the past.
maybe that’s why yesterday loves sticking around, and why tomorrow gets tired of waiting. and then it leaves me at the mercy of a merciless past.